I’d like to moderate one of the debates this year.

I’m a diehard GOP supporter, and also produced a television special highlighting my conservative values.

Why, no, I don’t think any of this can possibly be a conflict of interest. Obviously, I know how to be fair to the participants in the debate. Obviously, even though I have produced a TV special raking the democrats and their nominee over the coals, I can ask questions dispassionately. After all, I have journalistic integrity. My ethics are as strong as the typical network news anchor, such as Dan Rather. When I comment on the day’s events, I can do so with the non-opinionated resolve of a Keith Olbermann or Chris Matthews. And there is nothing in my personal life which would disqualify me from moderating the debates. Ask Campbell Brown. She knows my integrity.

I just want to ask Barack Obama a few questions. I’ll be fair. I promise.